yelling and shouting?

Yesterday, I went to the digital section of a mall to send my printer to be fixed. While waiting for the person in charged to tell me what actually was wrong with the printer, something happened. Well, it did not happen to me, but I was there. I had to wait for the person because the person had to attend to another customer who wanted to return a laptop table because the USB port is not functioning. When the person checked the receipt, it was already more than two weeks; it exceeds the warranty period. However, the customer said that she came before but she did not bring the receipt so only now she had the time to come. She said she was busy. I was listening to the conversation so I said to myself..ok..fine..you’re busy..So? I mean it’s her fault for not finding time. Then she kept on by saying that even when she came before, no one was at the counter and that everyone was ‘curi tulang’. I was like WHAT?? What’s wrong with this lady? I was happy that the person in charged at the counter questioned her back..because I would do the same thing.

Then, out of the blue, the husband yelled at the person in charged saying ‘You nak bagi balik ke xnak??’ When I say yell, I mean he really yelled like on top of his lung. I was shock-stricken. Then the person yelled back at him saying ‘Nak marah2 apa hal??!!’ Seriously, it was an interesting real-life drama and I never thought that I would be part of it. The best part was, the husband answered back saying ‘Kenapa you tanya banyak2 soalan?’ I, who was standing at the side, was like SERIOUSLY?? I mean he started it first..or should I say the wife started it first.. Why did he have to yell initially? We are all humans..no matter what our positions are, no matter how much money we have.. we are still the same..we do not have any rights to be disrespectful to others.. If u start to disrespect others, then you should not be surprised if others acted the same way towards you..right? The best part was, when the person in charged managed to get the wife to change the laptop table, I didn’t hear even a whisper of ‘thank you’. C’mon! Where’s your courtesy? That’s the simplest thing that anyone should do and yet, after yelling and shouting and showing off your authority, you can’t even say a simple thank you?

Maybe that’s why we are still considered people with third class mentality.. I am not trying to condemn the people involved in the drama.. I’m just sharing what I experienced which I think will be something that we can learn from.. Maybe both parties were guilty.. But my point is, we need to control our emotions..yelling and shouting? A big NO.. Instead of showing authority or masculinity, it actually shows how weak we are.. and worst of all, often times, we will not solve anything..

practicum

It has been a month since I first started my practicum. So far, I am still standing and my enthusiasm has not faded away. When I first started, I was really nervous. Not that I was scared; I was overwhelmed I guess. I was thinking about a lot of things – how should I portray myself when I enter the class, how should I talk to my students, what kind of boundaries should I set, will I be able to fit in with the other teachers, etc. All these questions were constantly playing in mind and to be honest, no matter how much I thought about them, I never really did find the answer.

Now, I feel that those questions were somewhat unnecessary. I am not saying that they are not worth thinking of; it’s just that sometimes I just need to go with the flow. My first week at school was not so bad. A shaky start I should say because I did not know my students yet and the fact that I was still adjusting to the school’s environment. There were many things that I wished I could do all over again if I could turn back time. Unfortunately, I can’t and like my lecturer said, sometimes we just need to learn to forgive ourselves. After all, we are normal human beings and mistakes are somewhat strongly intact to our nature.

To be honest, teaching is not easy. In fact, I can say that it is a profession that deals with the most unpredictability. I learn that I need to be creative, motivated and most importantly optimistic. There are times when I feel like my students will not learn and improve and there were times when it crossed my mind that I do not want to teach in schools. However, when I think of my students, I change my mind. Please don’t get me wrong. I am not saying that I am a motivated person like no other and that I am a good teacher. It’s just that within this short period of time, I came to realize that it is my obligation to help my students. It is my obligation to change their perceptions towards school and it is my obligation to prepare them for life. In other words, they made me realize that they need me. Therefore, I can’t just give up and take the easy way out by saying that my students just can’t learn where in reality, I am the one who may have not done my part yet.

So to all my friends who are teaching out there, lets pray for the best. May our enthusiasm persist and may we be given the strength to go through all the challenges that may come in our way...

lessons to be learnt

I sometimes feel that in life..it’s all about me..i mean my life is my life..your life is your life.. we are all different so mind our own businesses. Well, though there are some truth in it.. i came to realize this is not exactly how things should be. While I was reading ‘A Doctor in the House’ , a sentence caught my eyes: “There are always lessons to be learnt, if only we have the wisdom to see them.”

There are many ways to interpret this. From my point of view and relating it to what I wrote above, in life, there are many things that we can learn from one another. For instance, a friend of ours got into trouble because of his own mistakes.. well, it’s easy to just ignore but wouldn’t it be good if we learn from it so that we may not do the same thing? I am not proposing that we become nosy.. it’s just that by looking at others and the things that happen around us..there are actually many things that we can learn..

I remembered once and I think I wrote about this in one of my entries.. It was in the afternoon when the house bell rang.. and there. in front of the house gate stood three children (if i’m not mistaken)..who are siblings..selling traditional cookies (kuih). I mean at that age..when they were supposed to have fun like other kids..they were already involved directly in ensuring that their family has something to eat..i mean it is a big responsibility.. while I, on the other hand, often complains about not being able to buy clothes (which sometimes is unnecessary), about the hot weather even when I am in the house with the air conditioner on and many other things.. what about those kids? Reflecting on this, I think those kids are the ones who deserve to complain and yet, they did not.. So..this made me realize that when we really open our eyes like what Maher Zain said in one of his songs (though it’s not easy)..we can discover a lot..

My father often tells me that when we observe..( not to condemn..although we do this often)..try to reflect on our own selves.. and we will get something..for example, if we saw someone littering.. of course it’s hard not to feel irritated.. but most importantly, we need to ask ourselves..have we ever done that? If we just say how bad something is and we actually do the same thing..then what’s there to benefit from? We won’t learn anything right? That’s why we often say things happen for a reason..and one of the reasons is for us to learn.. and there are many things that we can learn from life.. if only we have the wisdom to see them...

of being perfect

Whether we realize it or not..everyday..we are trying to do our best..we are trying to make sure that our day goes smoothly..that everything will fall into place.. and this ‘trying’ is never ending because we just want things to be PERFECT. This may be true to some and may not be the case for others.. but I am pretty sure that at some point all of us must have felt this.

Does this mean that we are perfectionists? When I think about it, do perfectionists really exist? Or are they just organized people who manage to plan and do things well? Some may say that’s why they are perfect. But what does perfect really mean? Personally, i have had this urge inside me that keeps telling that everything needs to be PERFECT. I have this tendency to plan things when I wake up in the morning and sometimes the night before..and I want my day to go according to my plans.. Well, it’s normal to plan things but to make sure that everything is according to it..no addition..nothing else to it..i don’t think it’s normal..don’t you think?

Well, this was before.. Now, I do plan things BUTI I have learned that we can only plan.. because there are many circumstances that may change it.. like what I’ve written in my previous post.. we might spill coffee on your shirt and we might fall on the steps.. we might suddenly fall sick and we’re not able to go meet a friend..who knows?! after all it’s life..expect the unexpected! Just imagine the so-called perfect life (as people may call it)..everything is good, no disruptions, everyone is doing their job and carrying out their responsibilities dutifully..well it may seem like perfect..but just look at Bree in the Desperate Housewives..Isn’t is scary? I am not trying to condemn people..some like it this way..and I totally respect them..as I said..this is just my thought..a glimpse of my perspective which can be right and wrong..

I think we..especially me..need to start to accept that the mantra ‘I am not perfect’ is true.. As a normal human being..we, ourselves, need to accept the fact that we have many flaws.. we make mistakes.. we cant’s avoid errors and fault is inevitable.. but what we can do is DO OUR BEST..and we should not stop doing so. I think we need to go with the flow.. we need to be flexible..we need to adapt and adopt.. make some adjustments here and there.. LEARN from our and others’ experience and mistakes..I know it’s hard but we need to bear in mind that nobody’s perfect..as Tun Dr Mahathir said: ‘Perfect people simply do not exist’.

food!

Yesterday, i had luch at The Palm Coffe House at Tropicana Golf and Country Resort in Damansara with my family. It was my first time there and the place was recommended by my dad..who also likes to try new places to eat. I seldom do this review thingy but the food was really good (well, according to me). It ranges from local delights to western cuisine (we opted for mostly local cuisine) and the price is very reasonable... it's worth the taste and the quantity..

right: tahu bakar
left: loaded potatoe skin (the filling is like lasagne)

right: beef bacon sandwich
left: egg sandwich (toasted)

Thai Fried Rice with Soft Shell Crab

Penang Fried Kuey Teow

Singapore Fried Bihun

It's hard..

It’s hard to forget things..and it’s hard to get over things.. don’t u think so? Well not all things and maybe this is not the case for everyone.. Have you ever experienced a day, where everything starts off really good and then suddenly something happened such as you spilled coffee on your white shirt or you tripped on the staircase at work or you forgot to bring an important paperwork when you have already planned to show it to your boss.. you know, this kind of mishaps.. well ,they certainly do ruin our day and sometimes it haunts us throughout the day.. it makes us question why is this happening? How this would be different if I had been more careful? Why me? All the questions that make your day even more horrible!

Why is it so hard to get over these things? At times, when we can’t resolve it..we start to blame others..we find fault hoping that we can get our own selves out of the uncomfortable feeling.. a way out from blaming ourselves.. often times it is indeed very hard to take responsibility for our own mistakes.. it’s hard to be honest and say to ourselves: ‘Hey, I did this! I need to learn from it and not repeat it again’. I have experienced this before..I did blame other things for my own mistakes and it did help me feel at ease just for a while..but then everything starts to haunt me again. In other words..it does not resolve anything. But why is it so hard to face it? Is it because we love ourselves too much that we do not have the heart to admit our own mistakes? Or is it a matter of ego? Well, this is just a thought.. I do not know the answer..and I hope to know it one day...